What is this machine? Why are some folk scared that it might create a black hole that could destroy earth as we know it? This is the story of the "Large Hadron Collider". Pretty interesting stuff, if you're into outer space, science, and mind-blowing.
Currently in its final stages of construction, the LHC will become the worlds largest and highest-energy particle accelerator, or ATOM SMASHER. I prefer atom smasher.
What exactly IS an atom smasher? and how can it destroy me? good questions. Very good. yes. Complicated questions too. Very complicated. Couldnt be fully explained without going down a very long list of terms and definitions, including but not restricted to:
Accelerator physicsFeel free to read up on that stuff, and get back to me. My brain is too small to wrap around all that. So i will explain whats up with this death ray in working mans terms that even Kevin Federline can understand.
Anatoli Bugorski
Astrophysics
Beam dump
Beam line
Betatron
Channelling
Cryomodule
Cyclotron
Dipole magnet
Electromagnetism
Electron cooling
Ion implanter
Linear particle
accelerator
List of particles
Particle beam
Particle detector
Particle physics
Quadrupole magnet
Stochastic cooling
Superconducting
Radio Frequency
Superconducting
Super Collider
Synchrotron
Oohkay, so what you got here is your high energy atom smasher. A fuckin beam right. HELLA strong beam. Like a Gi joe lazer or something. Like Honey I shrunk the kids and shit.
Okay so we got this space lazer looking thing and it fucking blasts the beam. The beam hits these fucking hellllla tiny things. Like tiny lego blocks that make up our cells and shit. no not prison cells, like skin cells, and cocaine cells and titty cells and shit. Who gives a fuck about that? i know, right? Anyways, these rocket scientists study what happens when the high energy passes through these fucking hella tiny particles. Then they just chill and watch with their scientist microscope glasses.
I know right? microscope fuckin glasses. Basically though, the more energy they put into the beam, the more information they can collect. They then use that information the engineer more frost into our flakes and shit. Make bigger boobs and tastier bigmacs and shit.
... okay. enough of that.
You might be surprised to learn that your tv set, or your computer monitor actually contain the components of a particle accelerator. The difference between your tv atom smasher, and this fucking big ass atom smasher that some people are buzzing over, is that the large hadron collider may very well produce what are known as "Micro black holes". These are just like the black holes that swallow planets and galaxies and shit, but much smaller.
Scientists say chill out, because they can just bombard the tiny black holes with "Hawking Radiation" Which are theorized to shrink black holes. I say theorized, because according to wikipedia Hawking Radiation is "yet an experimentally-tested or naturally observed phenomenon" and and haters of the LHC say that that "micro black holes produced in a terrestrial laboratory might not decay as rapidly as calculated, or might even not be prone to decay and, if unable to rapidly evaporate, they could start interacting, grow larger and potentially be disastrous to Earth itself". Other people say, "fuck the black holes man, im scared of strangeletes." Straggeletes are "hypothetical particles" that critics said could "transform the Earth almost instantly into a dead, dense lump." Tiny bit fucking dope.
This is some superhero shit. But not really because nothings going to happen, and we will just get bigger bigmacs and frostier flakes. However it think its still fun to hold on to some of that Fred Savage wonderyersment, and day dream about particle physics tearing open another dimension or something. Or even better.. superheroes?
Check out this article in the New York Times about the LHC and who can accuratley judge the safety of such an experiment.
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